the three

Hallo :)
I'm writing because I want to, and because I have a few followers who are gently complaining that I'm not writing enough. Whatevs :D

So, as I'm trying to figure this whole school thing out (where I wanna go, what I wanna do, how far is too far away from home, the possibility of a car or not, scholarships) -- pretty much end of senior year of high school for me all over again -- Mom came into my room last night and asked if we could talk about school. Now lemme tell ya, talking about school lately, mostly with my dad, hasn't been the most pleasant thing to talk about in regards to money and Dad wanting me pretty much nowhere but Union. Anywho, Mom came in, asked to talk/say something, so I stopped my movie and she proceeded to tell me that she had been praying all day and felt like God was telling her to tell me that she was letting go; it didn't matter where I wanted to go, what I wanted to do, whether it be Memphis or whether it be Chicago, she would be backing me up 100% and she'd let me go.
I've been hearing this speech for awhile, but this was the first time that these words rang true, and I could see it.
Which, she said, if I wanted to go back to MC, was also an option. Whatever I felt like God was telling me to do.
This girl has done a GREAT job at blocking out all desire for MC and wanting to go there again. I mean, I've given it to God, and He's helped tremendously with giving and taking what I need given and taken, but to have MC as an option back on the table again? My head was spinning and my heart was racing and I could hardly breathe. All at once, these other schools I was looking at seemed blurry and worthless; I started picturing scenarios of music lessons/trips, roommates and old friends, and my mind wasn't stopping. I had to get alone with God, and fast!
I did what I normally always do when situations like these present themselves, and I go out, at night, into the streets of my neighborhood, look up at the stars, and cry. And when I've calmed down, I have some serious talk-time with Daddy. As I was freaking out under the beautiful sky He had provided, I was waiting and waiting for answers to come and epiphany's to be reached and all He gave me (which was enough) was this:
Be still.
Know that I am God.
And honestly, just like that, I was calm. The tears stopped, my stress level dropped to zero, and I was at an incredible peace.
When I came inside, I grabbed my copy of Jesus Calling and here's what the mini devotional was for that day:

"Waiting, trusting, and hoping are intricately connected, like golden strands interwoven to form a strong chain. Trusting is the central strand, because it is the response from My children that I desire the most. Waiting and hoping embellish the central strand and strengthen the chain that connects you to Me. Waiting for Me to work, with your eyes on Me, is evidence that you really do trust Me. If you mouth the words, "I trust You," while anxiously trying to make things go your way, your words ring hollow. Hoping is future-directed, connecting you to your inheritance in heaven. However, the benefits of hope fall fully on you in the present.
   Because you are Mine, you don't just pass time in your waiting. You can wait expectantly, in hopeful trust. Keep your "antennae" out to pick up even the faintest glimmer of My Presence."

John 14:1
Do not let your hearts be troubled. trust in God, trust also in Me.

Psalm 27:14
Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.

Hebrew 6:18-19
God did this so that, by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled to take hold of the hope offered to us may be greatly encouraged. We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.


That's not an answer, but that's straight up Truth, Peace, and not in my control.
Like, I know everybody gets stressed about things, everybody has to wait for things, nobody knows how things are going to turn out. Know what's been helping me a whole lot as far as that goes?
Trust first, hoping next, and waiting is just easy.
Those three just go together, you can't have one without the other.
=D